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Apology

December 5, 2009

Dear Parents Who Take Your Kids Out In Public In Their Pajamas:

I apologize.

I should never have made fun of you.

I should never have assumed you were slackers; that your touseled child was uncared for and consequently, unloved.

You were simply being efficient. It was cold outside. It was early morning, or late at night, and this just makes more sense. A Starbucks run in jammies probably saved your sanity.

Who am I to judge? I took my two year old (in footie pajamas) to BevMo last night. BevMo! At bedtime! (But they were having a SALE!!!) What kind of parent does that make me?!

Once again, I was wrong. I see the error of my ways.

And to you, Perfectly-Coiffed Mother of Well-Dressed Children:

I don’t hate you anymore.

I realize now that what we see on the outside rarely goes more than skin deep. That despite your perfect facade, you are (most likely) just as harried and frazzled at times by your children as I am. You probably take comfort in your gorgeous hair (and you should!) I applaud your neat attire. And just because your cherubs are acting sweet right now, doesn’t mean they always do. They probably throw tater-tots at each other over dinner, and you probably yell at them, too.

And finally,

To You, The Mom Who Bribes Her Kids With Candy,

I was wrong. So very, very, VERY wrong.

Their teeth have not rotted out of their wee heads. They are not hyperactive. They are not ridiculously spoilt.

They are sitting quietly in their carseats sucking on lollipops because I finally came to my senses enough to realize that while their mouths are otherwise occupied, I am afforded five minutes of blessed silence. Or good behavior. Or whatever it is I wanted them to do and knew that they wouldn’t without a motivational Dum-Dum.

Funny, isn’t it, how stupid we feel when we look back on life (and opinions) B.K. (Before Kids)?

What dumb assumptions or judgements did you once have about kids and parenting? What rules or social mores did you swear you’d never violate, but flagrantly did so A.K.?

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. December 6, 2009 6:11 am

    >I heart your blog! I've been away from it for awhile (had it bookmarked on my office computer, but it's not mine anymore since I was laid off in June). Take care Adelle!Margaret

  2. December 7, 2009 6:00 am

    >"what kind of parent does that make me?!"a smart one! for a good deal — you gotta do what you gotta do.

  3. February 11, 2010 7:26 am

    >BTW (because it's way after the fact) I think this was one of my favorite posts ever. Makes me wonder what sort of judgements I'll have to take back once I'm on the other side ofhte fence!

  4. January 7, 2012 1:15 pm

    My moment was over 27 years ago. I said to my brother about his 2-3 year old son in a pizza sit-down restaurant as the young lad was climbing around on the back of the seat and over the top: Glad my kids won’t be doing that!

    I am still embarrassed by that foolish and hurtful comment. I apologized a long time ago, but it still stings when I think about it…

    Ah, the wisdom that comes from walking in someone else’s shoes…

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