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Preoccupied.

April 19, 2011

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I know I haven’t been around much. Preoccupied. You see, in just two weeks from today I’ll be driving back to the place I spent four of the best years of my life. Oddly enough, I haven’t been back since.

I’ll be reconnecting with old friends.

I’ll be reacquainting myself with a dramatically changed campus.

I’ll be getting up in front of a room full of people and pretending that I am a grown-up who knows stuff.

And I’m going All. By. My. Self.

Which is weird. Very weird. I never go anywhere alone. Most certainly not without my better half (also known as my 6′ tall security blanket).

I’m a little freaked out to be doing this without him. Driving down is no big deal – I did that plenty ‘o times back in the day. But doing this very big thing…by myself. I’m not that person anymore.

I’m not a “self.”

I’m a “we.”

I wish it were different but sheesh – this event is right in the middle of the school year and we’ve got Fun Runs to run and homework to correct and baseball to play. Somebody has to hold down the fort.

Graciously, he’s willing to do that while off I go to the big blue ocean, to reconnect with a life I hardly remember.

I know it will be lovely – to be responsible for only my own self for four whole days. No one’s butt to wipe on the potty, no one’s dishes to load. No one’s face to swipe clean and no one to shuttle back and forth. That I won’t miss.

And there’s the ocean – I’ll be staring at it, walking in it, breathing it in for four whole days.

I just wish I were going as a “we” instead of “me.”

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