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On Marriage: Harrowing Adventures, Sob Stories, Happy Endings and Everything In Between

May 8, 2013
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On the occasion of an anniversary. The fifteenth one.

15th Anniversary

Marriage. It’s not any one thing.

It’s laughter and companionship.
It’s care and comfort.
It’s affection and attraction and lust.

It’s parenthood and side-by-side standing over their bed while they sleep, whispering prayers in the dark for their growth, and health, and bloom.

It’s shared suffering when life gets too big, too hard, too painful, crying together over things we cannot control. It’s compassion, when one of us is hurting and the other isn’t, assuaging the pain when nothing, and no one, else can.

It’s mild and gentle, common routines of the daily mundane. You empty, I load. You mow, I dust. I pour the milk, you get the silverware. Wiping noses, washing hair, folding laundry side-by-side on the floor.

It’s laughter and silly, stealing my pillow, and losing my page in the book. It’s benign and annoying habits, and poke her till she bites. It’s inside jokes and love of food, and the joy of a garden we made.

It’s uncharted territory, bleak and harrowing, vibrant and exciting. Forging new paths, new directions, different from what we both have known, frightening and thrilling all at once. New cities, new jobs, new callings, but together. It’s work and toil and paint, broken pipes and plumbing, Home Depot runs and finding the perfect vanity sink.

It’s also angry, and hurtful at times. Emotions worn raw because our very closeness leaves us vulnerable, one to the other. It’s disappointment and unmet expectations, because we are so different.

It’s also selflessness and letting go, putting wants and sometimes even needs aside, in favor of the greater good of the relationship. It’s a commitment, a choice. It’s giving in, not giving up, relaxing the fist and choosing the harder path of compromise over the alluring, yet always unattainable, win.

15th v2

It’s John 15 and laying down our life for the other, day after day, year after year. Rain, or shine, good days, bad days, even-when-it-hurts days, days of sunshine, and days of sorrow.

It’s bearing the burden of the other when the burden becomes too heavy. It’s shining hope when the other is too deep in darkness to find it.

It’s gentle leading, hand-holding, side-by-side swinging in the moonlight and wondering what we’ll be doing for the next 15 years.

It’s dreaming of the life we’ve yet to live, of the joys and sorrows yet to come, of the ups and downs and all arounds, a journey never-ending,  ever-challenging. Change, our only constant on this adventure.

It’s worth it, every minute. Every tear, every laugh, every moment we’ve had together, of bliss and torment, it’s worth it.

I choose to walk this life with you.

download (9)

Read more of this love story…

Impossible

On Falling In Love, Part I

On Falling In Love, Part II (What I Learned From Living in Maine)

On Falling In Love, Part III

On Falling In Love, Part IV (Gabe’s View)

Thanks for reading. Go hug someone you love.

Grace and peace be yours in abundance,

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The conversation continues over on Facebook. Follow my author page for more insights and resources about living a shiny, abundant and beautiful life. 

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. Rosie Parket permalink
    May 8, 2013 9:25 pm

    Beautiful. Well said 🙂

    Sent from my iPhone

  2. Lisa permalink
    May 9, 2013 5:51 am

    Congratulations! We are celebrating 29 this summer and it really does just keep getting better when you made a good choice!!!

  3. Bethany Fitelson permalink
    May 9, 2013 8:05 am

    Happy anniversary! I love your love story.

  4. Jackie permalink
    May 9, 2013 9:55 am

    Such a wonderful depiction of life with the man you love with your whole heart and soul!

  5. May 9, 2013 8:37 pm

    Beautiful! Happy Anniversary!

  6. May 9, 2013 9:17 pm

    I loved this. Happy anniversary!

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